We’re taking a break from the Relationship Killer Series to talk about the number 16.
Frankly, I don’t know why I have to focus on 16, but I just do what I’m told so I don’t get yelled at by someone with the number 16 in their name that will remain nameless. *side eye*
Anyways, here’s 16 tips that ladies should do TONIGHT!
1) Bondage is always a win- Use a satin scarf and tie it tight. For go handcuff, they’ll only be a oh so familiar reminder of being in the backseat of a cop car. Even with the fur trim.
2) Stripper Basics 101- Use chair with no handles. It’ll be easier to straddle him.
3) Food Glorious Food-Sex on a full stomach is great! Cook up something spicy. On second thought, gas is never sexy. Stick to what you know.
4) New Pantie Draws- Even if he never sees it, you always instantly feel confident when you were something cute, sexy and most importantly NEW.
5) Pull a ‘Nia Long’- Like in Love Jones, remember, just walk through the door, without one work, and start unbuckling. He’s get the picture.
6) Bubble baths- it’s cliche, I know, but it never fails!
7) Mirror Mirror on the…floor-Take down that ikea full length mirror and turn it side ways. Bare floor and no sheets will help you see all the action
8) Read a book- I don’t mean Harry Potter, I mean a naughty book. Zane is always a winner in this department. Make sure you read it from across the room. No touching until the story is done.
9) Leave you heels on-This is tricky, so make sure they’re the right type of heels. Not too pointy, or you can seriously hurt him, or worst, yourself.
10) Play a game-Competition and challenge is the best form of foreplay
11) Tanning Oil- It’s cheap, it smells good, and most of all it reminds you of the summer. Heat some in a bowl for 15 secs.
12) Good Head/Dental Dam- for a more pleasurable oral experience, invest in these products.
13) Move of the day- check out sites like Cosmopolitan.com for the sex move of the day and try it. Be smooth about it, or at least try to be. They even have an app for your iPhone!
14) Porn Showcase- Face it, he has porn. Let go of your disgust and watch it with him. You may learn a few things.
15) Hide and go freak-Don’t be too hard to find yet don’t hide in the most obvious place either.
16) Scream, well, anything-Sometimes girls are really quiet during sex. If you let out a out-of-nowhere-gut-wrenching-yet-pleasurable scream, it’ll definitely excite him.