The truth about why Men Cheat! Courtesy of Brandon Carter

My homegirl Tyiesha from the Bank across the street came into my day gig the other day in the midst of a testosterone-filled afternoon thanks to ever-so-reliable controversy sparkers, Gee and non other than Brandon Carter.

Well….Ms. Tyiesha had a question that seemed simple enough to her, as it does to most women apparently, but is really the age old question that’s been tormenting their minds for centuries now. Her question?

Why do men cheat? If they know they’re gonna cheat, why have a girlfriend?

The answer is as simple in actuality as her question seemed in theory.

Watch here as Brandon Breaks it down for all women. For any of you men who somehow didn’t know this, I guess this is Man-Up 101 for you as well!

Let me just go on record as saying that this is a conversation that I have held a million times, I prompted this particular convo, and I would like it to be known that I do not condone nor relate to any man who cheats in a serial fashion. In other words, I don’t associate with CHEATERS on average. I don’t respect what they do, nor have I ever been. YET, it is my firm belief that almost EVERY Man WILL CHEAT if given the proper oppurtunity, and have cheated at least once in their lifetimes (if they are the kind that actually get women). I know women cheat alot as well, but our reasons are totally different…Mainly because men don’t require reason at all for their infidelites. And yes, I have cheated before.

Your thoughts?

Sex & The Chocolate City – Entry # 3

The eye of the Tiger

So I know everyone has been talking about the ‘Tiger Tiger Woods ya’ll’ scandal, so I figured I’d throw in my two cents. (Dust off soap box, clears throat)

Hear ye’, Hear ye’! Men cheat. He is a man. This is nothing new. That is all.

I mean, were people really surprised by this? cause I certainly was not. The only thing that made me raise a fraction of an eyebrow was the amount of attention and buzz this created, as if this was a new concept. A complete media frenzy, with women, pearls clutched, gasping at the audacity of Tiger, the utter definition of a melting pot who reached fame through his putt putt skills and cheated on his snow white wife.

Presidents, Businessmen, athletes, rappers, drug dealers, even delivery men cheat. So for people to be so astonished by this is a mystery to me.

I am in no way saying that every man on the planet cheats, or that all famous men cheat, but let’s face it, statistics don’t lie. 57% of all married men have had an extra marital affair at some point. Average length of an affair, TWO years and in most cases, the affairs are never discovered.

And then women have the nerve and audacity to ask the question why. Why did this happen? Why did he cheat on me?

Let’s first delve into the point, do you really want to know the answer? Because no matter what answer he gives you, it’s always going to be a dumb selfish one. It won’t bring clarity or heal your wounds. There is no satisfaction in knowing the whys, hows, wheres, and whoms.

The most important question that women, i.e Mrs. Tiger Woods, should be asking is what am I going to do now? What’s my next step?

It’s not about what your man is going to do for you or how he should make it up to you if you decide to stay. What’s important is what you are going to do for yourself. You should be your sole focus. You cannot stay stuck in the past. What’s done is done, move on for your own sanity and your children if applicable. Make peace with yourself and know that no matter what you could’ve possibly done does not warrant your mate stepping out on you.  I know all about cheating. I’m not going to sugar coat it. It sucks. There are no words for the amount of pain you go through. No one can honestly comfort you. The only person that can sincerely comfort you is you.

TDJ